The parent survival kit

Having searched on Google for the ultimate parent survival kit, I can honestly say that there aren’t many that would get me through the day. Pamper items are not much use, because every parent of small children knows that even having a pee alone is a massive challenge, let alone having a full pamper session. Feel free to go ahead and buy a candle or similar stuff, but if your house is anything like mine then the minute you light those candles and settle down into the bath, you’ll have a child banging on the door announcing that they need a wee or a poo.

Which kind of kills the atmosphere.

So I’ve put together my own realistic parent survival kit. There’s nothing that will enable you to have a pee without a small child following you into the bathroom, but hopefully, some of these items might make the parenting journey a bit easier.

They definitely do for me!

Paracetamol

As much as I love my children, they can be headache-inducing, especially on car journeys. There are only so many times my head can tolerate endless shouts of “mummy, mummy!”, YouTube Kids, my 3-year-old pretending to be a builder and putting on his “builder voice” and the same episodes of Peppa Pig over and over again before it starts to ache.

It’s aching now just thinking about it.

Playlist

Another great one for car journeys. My 6-year-old always complains about my choice of music in the car (god help me if I happen to listen to anything instrumental – she always complains about the lack of lyrics). So I’ve started making playlists with songs on for everybody. I also have my own personal playlist that I can listen to in peace without any complaints whilst I tidy up the house in preparation for the kids arriving home from school/nursery and messing it up again.

A calendar

I used to be good at remembering events and appointments, mostly because there was only something major every few months or so.

Younger me: “Ha! I don’t need a calendar! I can remember EVERYTHING! I’ll buy one for the cool pictures but I won’t need it for anything else!”

Older me: “F*ck the pictures, I just need something with dates on or my poor brain will explode!!!”

I mostly rely on my phone calendar now, but even that gets exhausted because there’s an appointment or school event EVERY. SINGLE. WEEK!

A National Trust Membership

I never knew how much I needed a National Trust membership until I became a parent. The National Trust sites have some great attractions such as gardens, play parks and museums. Easter and Christmas are particularly great times to visit, as the parks often hold special events or decorate the gardens for holiday-themed trails. The cafés are great too, just make sure you buy the right cake and drink.

Netflix

Well, we all need a bit of escapism at the end of a hard parenting day, don’t we?! Just make sure you make use of those parental controls or you could end up with the Shaun the Sheep movie appearing on your bank statement.

Wine

This wouldn’t be a parent survival kit without wine, would it?

Chocolate

Same as the wine.

Baby wipes

An item that definitely needs to be included in the parent survival kit. Just don’t forget them like I once did. A baby plus a poonami minus baby wipes equals a messy disaster, especially if you’re somewhere where there’s no toilets.

Coffee

There’s absolutely no way I would be in any state to deal with the daily demands of two small children without coffee. It’s the first thing I go to at the start of the day and the first thing I seek out on a walk. If there’s a coffee stand in a park, then I get more excited than the kids do when they spot an ice cream van.  

Maybe I’ll start up a new business selling my very own parent survival kits, though the National Trust membership unfortunately won’t be included. You can get that here.