I’m not going to lie – I HATE role-playing with my kids. I’m not an actress. I don’t do voices. So when my kids ask the dreaded question “will you play with me?” I always make an excuse.
“Er, I’m just busy preparing the dinner,” is my usual response, even when it’s only 10 a.m.
My kids continue to beg me and I feel bad, I really do, but the thought of pretending to be a teacher/customer/policewoman for an hour is draining. There have been occasions where I’ve given in.
6-year-old: “Can I introduce you to my pupils, mummy?”
Me (trying not to groan): “Go on then.”
The “pupils” are cuddly toys, of which there are fifty.
I then have to sit through the entire lesson and pretend to do the school run.
The horror.
Why oh why do kids enjoy playing school? Where do they get the energy?! Why would you want to act out a school scenario when you’ve just been there for six bloody hours?!
I’ll never understand it.
Then there’s the 3-year-old, who loves tractors, dinosaurs and ice cream vans. One of his favourite games is driving his ice cream van around and asking his toy dinosaurs if they want an ice cream.
I’m usually asked to play the part of the dinosaurs.
3-year-old: “What ice cream would you like?”
Me (waving a toy dinosaur around and feeling like an idiot): “A strawberry and chocolate one please.”
The ice cream is then handed to me and the van leaves while playing a nice jingle. Then it arrives back a minute later and the process is repeated again. And again. And again.
I should make it clear that I love spending time with my kids. But role-playing? No. That job goes to daddy, who somehow never ever seems to hate role-playing with the kids.
I feel guilty that I hate role-playing with my kids, but then I remind myself that there are plenty of other activities that I enjoy doing with them.
Here are just a few that are great for all the family (no dinosaurs or cuddly toys in sight, but there may be an ice cream van).
Walking
Ok, so long walks with kids may involve constant complaints about needing the toilet, being bored or being hungry, but it’s still a great family activity. The kids get to burn off plenty of energy in addition to seeing lots of lovely wildlife and the adults don’t have to worry about the house getting trashed (until you arrive home).
It’s a win-win.
Even better if there’s a coffee shop with massive slices of cake.
Museums
I’m not talking about museums like the National Portrait Gallery, that would be a disaster with small kiddies. The portraits would probably end up with more mess on them than they did during Just Stop Oil’s climate change protests. I’m talking about places such as the Museum of Childhood in Sudbury, which not only has wonderful child-friendly displays but also other great activities such as drawing and building.
Might be best to avoid museums with replicas of tiny Victorian houses if you have toddlers though.
Baking
I like baking. I’m no Mary Berry, and there’s been more than one soggy bottom (my cakes, not the kids), but it’s a great activity for helping kids learn measurements. The 6-year-old loves it. We often stick to cupcakes or fork biscuits as they are very easy to make.
Baking is also a lovely bonding activity and is perfect if you want something that gives you a little one-on-one time with your kids (I’d never bake with both at the same time – that would be carnage). The kitchen looks a mess afterwards but it’s worth it. Mostly because we get to eat biscuits and cake at the end of it.
Receipe here.
Easter Egg hunts
Easter is my favourite time of the year. Winter has buggered off, the flowers are blooming and there’s chocolate. Perfect! I have fun hiding the chocolate eggs and the kids have fun seeking them out. And I love to help them eat the eggs.
Well they can’t have all that sugar to themselves, can they?!
Arts and crafts
Arts and crafts are a great alternative to role-playing. I’d much rather draw a dinosaur than pretend to be one. We have an arts and crafts cupboard filled with paints, paper, writing pads, coloured pencils and even stickers. There used to be a Play-Doh set in there too, but the 3-year-old had a “toddlers are arseholes” moment and decided it would be a good idea to see if the lovely green ball of Play-Doh would fit nicely into all of the plug sockets.
It did.
So that’s now banned.
Forever.
So the main thing I’ve learned is that it’s perfectly ok to dislike role-playing with your kids. There’s nothing wrong with hating pretending to be a dinosaur or helping fifty cuddly toys complete the school run.
How any parent could ever enjoy any imaginative play that involves the school run is a mystery to me.
